Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Soap Spoof (Part 1)
SIMON sits at table waiting for something to happen. Nothing happens until the door opens. His long lost brother walks in.
MARK: It’s been a long time bruv
Simon: Yes, I’ve been waiting here five years.
Mark: I’m sorry but I had to go away.
Simon: Did you get the chips?
Mark: Eh?
Simon: I’ve been waiting all this time for you to come back from the sodding chip shop and when you finally get back you don’t even get the thing you were supposed to.
Mark: Leave it out; I’ve had a hard time.
Simon: Doing what?
Mark: Well, as you remember, I was on the run from the police having escaped from prison after I was setup for killing our mother, which I didn’t do, you had set me up after I had killed your fiancée and I had killed her coz she was a cow.
Simon: Leave it out!
Mark: We sorted it back then, remember? Anyway I went to get the chips when I bumped into mum who wasn’t dead after all. She could prove my innocence but she was still on the run from the morgue. I was still on the run from the police for her murder. So we fled to Europe until mum conveniently died in some sort of an accident thus proving my innocence and that it wasn’t me that killed her.
Simon: Ah well that has filled me in, and with mum dead again things are back to how they were in the good old days. But it doesn’t explain why you haven’t got me chips.
MARK: It’s been a long time bruv
Simon: Yes, I’ve been waiting here five years.
Mark: I’m sorry but I had to go away.
Simon: Did you get the chips?
Mark: Eh?
Simon: I’ve been waiting all this time for you to come back from the sodding chip shop and when you finally get back you don’t even get the thing you were supposed to.
Mark: Leave it out; I’ve had a hard time.
Simon: Doing what?
Mark: Well, as you remember, I was on the run from the police having escaped from prison after I was setup for killing our mother, which I didn’t do, you had set me up after I had killed your fiancée and I had killed her coz she was a cow.
Simon: Leave it out!
Mark: We sorted it back then, remember? Anyway I went to get the chips when I bumped into mum who wasn’t dead after all. She could prove my innocence but she was still on the run from the morgue. I was still on the run from the police for her murder. So we fled to Europe until mum conveniently died in some sort of an accident thus proving my innocence and that it wasn’t me that killed her.
Simon: Ah well that has filled me in, and with mum dead again things are back to how they were in the good old days. But it doesn’t explain why you haven’t got me chips.
